LOL: Real tech support calls
Thanks to reader Bob Ortiz for this humourous email forward. It’s a transcript of a handful of real technical support calls. So if you’re ever feeling like you’re not the most technically savvy person on the planet, you’ll see there are those far worse off than you. Enjoy!
Thanks to reader Bob Ortiz for this humourous email forward. It's a transcript of a handful of real technical support calls. So if you're ever feeling like you're not the most technically savvy person on the planet, you'll see there are those far worse off than you. Enjoy!
The following are a number of transcribed conversations to technical support departments:
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Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Christine says: A white one…
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Customer: Hi, this is Maureen. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No , wait a minute.. I hadn't inserted it yet… it's still on my desk.. Sorry….
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Tech support: Click on the 'My Computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
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Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello… I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and –.
Customer: Listen pal, don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates.
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Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer.' I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it…
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Customer: I have problems printing in red…
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah…………………thank you.
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Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at Woolies..
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Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer:! OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah…that one does work…
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Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters ?
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Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
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Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry…Internet Explorer.
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Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
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Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?
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A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer:
Tech support: Are you running it under Windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."
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And last, but not least…
Tech support: "Okay Mickey, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P " to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Colin.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P"…..on your keyboard, Colin.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!
I have heard all of these and worse. I worked computer support, and digital camera support. Some good stories.
And even if people are newbies to the tech world there are some things called common sense, or just don't act like you know everything when you really don't. Admit that you aren't sure and us techs wont laugh (out loud at you) we'd be MORE than happy to teach you.
But I am sorry if you act like you know everything about computers and you make a simple stupid mistake then I am going to have a field day with you.
LOLL…this reminds me of time I was working in Citibank. I asked the customer if they can go to their respective bank and make a payment there. They guy says.."well, I don't own a bank, sonny. I am not that rich". My God!! People can be thick sumtimes huh
This was a good laugh – I used to work for T-mobile doing technical support for PDA's & Blackberry's and some of the calls were ridiculous.
Congratulations! You've made me laugh for the day. I never realized people could be so funny over the phone with tech supports.
Recently, I got this new mp3 player and I took it back to get an exchange because the headphones weren't working and the music started to bleep. The representative figured it out and still gave me a new mp3 player. So when I got the second new mp3 player, the same thing was happening again and my sister figured it out and said "Are you dum? You didn't plug it in all the way.". That's when I realize I made a fool of myself.
there's a hilarious website filled with just transcriptions of customer service encounters called notalwaysright.com…..I used to work in telephone IT support and I believe these are all 100% real
LOLz! If I had to talk to those people, I would probably be banging my head on the wall :P
My all time favorite tech support comedy video. Watch and enjoy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRBIVRwvUeE
Really Funny.. LOL.. My stomach hurts…
I have heared these kind of things.. but this article is awesome..
Had a fun time reading this –
Here's one I got:
User: How do I create a new slide in Powerpoint
Myself: You see that big button at the top that says "new slide". Click that.
hehe Have you ever seen someone try to use their mouse facing the wrong way (buttons under their palm)???? I have lol
I must confess that, until recently, I couldn't figure out what PrintScreen did. Only taking a course in which it's mentioned let me know – I mean, I've never NEEDED it, but I would hit it periodically out of curiosity and then I just figured something wasn't set up right…
Too funny. I used to work in a call centre next to a tech support section, and hear their stories. I sold acne products and still had hilarious calls, not only from people who couldn't follow the simple directions on the bottle, but from people who couldn't work the website.
My personal favourite was a girl who called to let us knew there was something wrong with the website. She couldn't put in her credit card number, but she could put letters in the box. Long story short, she didn't have the number lock on.
ahhhh the famous Numlock. You haven't done your time as a tech till you have gotten a call about that key. I even had someone that couldn't find the key labelled SPACE.
I used to work at a call center dealing with tech support for interenet digital phone and cable. on a hot day one woman called in to tell me her air conditioner wasn't working. i asked her if she was having problems with any of the services we provide her with. she said no i just want the air to work. when i told her she needed to call a different company she started crying and yelling at me to fix it.
I have been a tech support person for quite some time. I can tell you these are real. I've seen and heard all kinds of stuff. After a while you stop laughing and just shake your head. People have NO common sense anymore.
And you think these are funny. You have no idea what humour is.. What a waste of Bandwidth!!!
Now, if they could just remove that 'wrong key' from the keyboard, and replace it with the 'any key', I'd be all set!
I have 2 special ones that happened to me as a tech:
1 – ME: "Can you tell me what is written on your monitor?"
CLIENT: "V-I-E-W-S-O-N-I-C"
2 – CLIENT: "The computer doesn't start!"
ME: "Could you verify if the computer is connected to the power bar please"
CLIENT: "I can't, there's a power shortage and I can't see behind the desk"
And just to let you know, these happened from high positionned people at Air Canada!!!