Is it rude to check your BlackBerry in public?
Had an enjoyable lunch today at a Dell event in downtown Toronto and found myself seated at a table with a few analysts and journalists (including Sync contributor and all-around nice guy, Peter Wolchak). OK, so I glanced at my BlackBerry a few times as I was expecting an important email. Was that rude?
Had an enjoyable lunch today at a Dell event in downtown Toronto and found myself seated at a table with a few analysts and journalists (including Sync contributor and all-around nice guy, Peter Wolchak). OK, so I glanced at my BlackBerry a few times as I was expecting an important email. Was that rude?
So I’ve read all these articles about how our social graces are going in the dumpster because our faces are stuck in our smartphones when in public. Etiquette has been kicked to the curb in today’s day and age, and all that.
Honestly, I don’t think I’m one of *those* guys who can’t carry on an eye-to-eye conversation with someone, but it’s true when you work for yourself and you have access to your digital world in the palm of your hand, it’s freaking tempting to look down to see what’s going on. After all, if it weren’t for this technology I wouldn’t be able to attend this lunch n’ learn event because I’d be tethered to my PC at home, no?
So, what’ the proper protocol? Never look at your BlackBerry when you’e in public? Or is it perfectly acceptable today to carry on a conversation while you’re thumbing through your inbox? Personally, I split the difference: I politely notified the table of 6 or so that I was expecting an email from an editor and had to check my messages every few minutes, and I did not continue talking to anyone while looking down at my phone. Did I handle this correctly?
What do you do?
I have a notification tone on mine that is just loud enough for anyone I'm talking with to hear. When it goes off, everyone knows that I have an email/text/phone call and, depending on the company I'm in, I either ignore it, or if it's important, I'll ask them to excuse me and answer it.
All depends. Did you stop and read the e-mail and respond back to it when you got it? I don't see this as something wrong, you told them that you were expecting an important call. It wasn't as if people were texting you and you were texting them back throughout the whole conversation.
This is why there is vibrate so you don't have to keep looking and then when you get your important email just go to the bathroom, that way no one knows and you can kill 2 birds with one stone.
I like Steve's comment because it's true. Personally, although I stay away from cell phones, I would think as long you let them know and excuse yourself from their company without making a scene people should be okay with you taking important calls/e-mails/texts.
Any excuse for using your hand held device while speaking with others is not only ignorant, it can be dangerous. Any attempt to explain otherwise only belittles those around you. You only made the effort to show how powerful and important you think you are.
The proper thing to do is to demonstrate your real power and ability by managing your schedule responsibly and by turning off the device to respect any situation. This applies to private meetings with your boss, subordinates, friends or family, as well as public gatherings such as movie theatres and driving.
You never need to ask if it is okay, you know better.
If you were my child, I would confiscate the device. As an adult, I would get up from the table and say “I will contact you at my convenience.”
Yes i consider it rude ! If you say " Excuse me , I need to check my BlackBerry for a moment" then proceed to check it… fine , but to just bring it out of your pocket & start checking it, especially if you are engaged in conversation with this person, then yes , it is in my opinion, RUDE !
Well, as stated there is a vibration mode..Use that. I have a BLackberry too, and when it vibrates I check it(when it is not rude) when I have time.I dont jump and check it the very second I get it. People who non -stop are texting and checking there Blackberrys look like they r trying to be COOL, and you are not! Just annoying!
Thanks for the feedback, guys. I failed to mention the BlackBerry was on silent (not even vibrate) but had to glance at it from time to time…such is the life of a freelance journalist…!
Marc
I think it depends on your attitude, but I personally have no problem with people checking their Blackberry, especially if it's something important.
YES
I just got my blackberry yesterday so I am new at this. But I am a free lance writer so keeping in contact with my editor can be very important. I would set it to vibrate and excuse myself from the table to look. They don't need to know why, you could be going to the washroom However, you might be someone who gets lots of e-mails and that might not work in which case depending on the company and the situation, I might just be honest and say so.
Having said that is it any different than glancing at our watches – in some circles that would be considered rude too.
I have to agree with Dwayne.
Get an assitand,
your prodectivity will increased by 100% and you will finish conversations and the meal while it is hot.
I grew up with parents that ran a business. They were working even at home or dinner or when they were among friends because of constant phone calls. It's an understandable situation.
Personally, I think you did the right thing. To say that you are rude, is a bit harsh. People nowadays have careers that are impacted by the standards of technology.
In the end, it really depends where you are, the relationship between the person you are having a conversation with, and the seriousness of the conversation.
Mainly it's called self-discipline. You do not need to be tethered to any device, and unless you are a rapid response medical, bomb-disposal or SWAT team or stockbroker there is rarely as much urgency to anything as you wish to persuade yourself there is.
I can feel smug of course since having vision problems (no, not THAT kind of Vision!) I can't use a BlackBerry at all, or text on a regular phone. For me the smallest it will ever get is those nice almost-pocket-sized ASUS thingies with the flash drives. But I still forget to turn off my phone at lunch when I remember to bring my phone at all.
Rule 1A In public is ok; in public spaces like restaurants and theatres it is not ok.
Rule 1B: in company (any kind of conversation group) it io never ok. Your immediate company takes precedence over all remote contacts.
Rule 2. You're expecting an important call/message/whatever. When it comes, you'll know it because the phone will, you know, ring or vibrate or whatever it is they do now. So don't bother checking, you're just telling everyone around you that someone who isn't there is more important than they ever could be.
In ALL cases. Whoever you are presently physically with is more important than someone not there who might or might not call. Stoop squandering your moral credit with others, one day you'll need it.
E
i dont think so
Absolutely 100% rude. I find it offensive that a person can't carry on a personal conversation without checking any device.
Put the darned thing away – at least while you are in my company.
I think it depends on the company you are with.
I too am a journalist and often on call for fires/accidents and so on.
If I'm with fellow journalists, I would hope they would understand when I quickly check an incoming vibrating alert.
However, in a more personal setting, I think it is rude. Checking your iPhone or blackberry while enjoying dinner with a personal friend, family member or beautiful, engaging date, it is time to not only ignore the machine, but turn it off completely. Amazing – they do take messages!
YES IT WAS RUDE !!!
It is so rude. Im sure your email can wait 30 min. till lunch is over.
No, I think depending on the company, and the occasion, it is not rude to check an incoming msg/email, as long as you're checking it because you actually got an alert.
Personally, i broke my watch a little while back, and have yet to replace it, because my phone has become my new time-keeper, so I haven't seen the need. Treat it like a watch… ask yourself before you look at it whether, in the other persons/peoples place, would you feel like you are being treated with disrespect?.. would you come off as a person who is constantly looking at his watch because he is bored of his present company?